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Healthy vs Abusive Relationships

Sometimes it can be hard to tell if you are in a healthy relationship or an abusive one.  We receive many mixed messages from our family and friends. South Asian traditions tell women to do their “duty” towards husbands, sons and in-laws. Besides, all couples fight occasionally. How do you know what is part of a normal relationship and what is abuse?

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Safety Planning

Whether you decide to stay or leave your relationship is your decision. You are your own best friend. However, you should begin to empower yourself by bringing about a change in your relationship if possible, without endangering yourself or your children. One of the first steps you can take is to put together a Safety Plan as follows:

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Restraining Orders

 (209A Abuse Prevention Orders)

If you do not feel safe, you may apply for a restraining order at District Court (or through the local police if the Court is closed) to help protect yourself and your family from:

 “family or household members” that have abused you.

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Domestic Violence and Immigration Law

  • There are immigration laws that can help you escape violence and get legal immigration status even if:
  • You are being abused by your U.S. Citizen or Lawful Permanent Resident (“green card”) spouse, parent, or child (over 21)
  • Your child is being abused by his or her U.S. Citizen or Lawful Permanent Resident (“green card”) parent
  • You are undocumented or without legal immigration status
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Everyone feels sad sometimes, but these feelings usually pass after a few days. If, on the other hand there are issues with managing daily activities for weeks at a time then please seek appropriate professional help. Depression is a serious illness that requires proper treatment.

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Anxiety Disorders

All of us feel anxious sometimes; it is common to feel anxious before an interview, a long journey or a major presentation at work. This is normal and passes in due course of time. Anxiety disorders, however, are not temporary and do not go away, worries and fears stay for long periods of time, and can worsen. These disorders can affect daily life, family relationships, color social interactions, and impact performance at work.

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